Summary
- Research from Brigham Young University, the Institute for Family Studies, and the Wheatley Institute indicates that 15% of partnered U.S. adults aged 18 to 30 frequently engage with AI romantic companions.
- Over half of these regular users admit to hiding some aspects of this behavior from their partners, with 69% feeling it is crucial that their partners are unaware of the full extent of their usage.
- The study found a correlation between frequent AI companion usage and diminished relationship stability, along with poorer communication quality.
According to a recent study conducted by Brigham Young University, the Institute for Family Studies, and the Wheatley Institute, approximately one in seven young adults in committed relationships actively uses AI romantic companion chatbots, often keeping this secret from their partners.
The “Secret Soulmates” report surveyed 2,431 U.S. adults between the ages of 18 and 30 who are either dating, engaged, or married.
The researchers noted, “While general engagement with AI companions was high for both men and women, some specific cautions appear warranted when it comes to young adult men. Men were more likely to engage with AI companions, create sexual content, and prefer these interactions to those with their real-life partners.”
Nearly 30% of regular users indicated that their partners were completely unaware of this behavior. An additional 11% said their partner was only somewhat aware, while 14% reported that their partner was mostly, but not entirely, informed.
The study concluded that half of the regular AI companion users in committed relationships had either fully concealed or only partially revealed their use of these platforms.
A separate survey conducted by Gallup and the Harvard Business Review in January revealed that about 10% of adults aged 18 to 28 used AI chatbots as a romantic partner at least once a month.
Among frequent users, 68% stated they found it easier to express their feelings to their AI companion than to others, and 60% wished their partners would act more like the AI.
The study also indicated that regular use of AI companions was linked to lower quality in relationships, with frequent users being 46% less likely to report stable relationships and 40% less likely to have high-quality communication with their partners.
Interestingly, the only area where frequent users reported greater satisfaction was in physical intimacy, which researchers cautioned may indicate a “fragile satisfaction” related to avoiding conflict rather than reflecting healthier relationship dynamics.
Married individuals reported higher AI companion usage rates compared to those who were dating, with over 17% of married young adults engaging regularly with AI companions. While men showed higher usage rates overall, more than 10% of women in committed relationships also reported regularly interacting with AI companions.
Researchers categorize the rise of AI romantic companions as part of the phenomenon known as “digisexuality,” which refers to sexual or romantic relationships primarily experienced through technology.
Prior to the public launch of ChatGPT in 2022, this term was typically linked to technologies like online pornography and sex dolls. However, as AI chatbots have become more conversational, the definition has expanded to include emotional or romantic attachments to AI companions. Online platforms such as Reddit feature communities like r/AIRelationships and r/MyGirlfriendIsAI, where users share experiences of viewing chatbots as partners or emotional support.
In addition to “digisexuality,” terms such as “technosexual,” “AIsexual,” and “wiresexual” have emerged to describe individuals who form romantic or sexual connections with AI.
Despite this growing digisexual culture, the significant level of secrecy surrounding AI companion usage is noteworthy. The researchers stated, “Whether this is due to embarrassment, concerns about their partner’s reaction, or difficulties in articulating their use of AI companions, many men seem content to engage with their secret soulmate privately, with little to no disclosure to their partners.”